Growing up means not caring about Maxim...

When I was in college, I remember being hooked on Maxim. It wasn't so much that I saw my life in it as I saw what I wanted my life to be - drinking all the time, having big circles of friends, staying out late. Hot chicks in bikinis didn't hurt, either.

I still get Maxim - years ago I signed up for a bunch of free offers online, and now I've got a subscription until sometime in 2011. Whee.

I glance at them, but they always just make me feel old. I don't go out very much, I don't drink very much - I've probably had more diet sodas today than I have beers in the last month - and the stories in Maxim don't really do much for me. I never had the Maxim lifestyle, but now I don't really want it either - I'm older, more mature, a suburban homeowner. I'm not trying to bang tons of chicks (not that I ever was, or could), just trying to find one willing to put up with me long-term.

And the articles/advice in Maxim is hollow, and sometimes downright creepy. One of the articles in the one I got today discussed the fact that women cheat on their men almost as much as the reverse (which I guess isn't shocking, if you do the math). It ended the article commenting that this is good if you are a single guy, because you can probably hook up with some chick who cheating on her boyfriend, and when she finally dumps him she might be interested in you.

Because being "that guy she cheated on with" is really a noble goal, and a great starting ground for a relationship...