Why am I so ugly, and what can I do about it?

There's a pay dating site that I have a membership for (I had a coupon code). Let's just call it PeeHarmony. Every now and then they run promos where you can "communicate" for free, but if you aren't a paying member you can only get so far into the communication process, and non-members also can't see the pictures posted by paying members. During these promos I sneak my email address into communications so that if the person isn't a member they can get in touch with me.

I've had that happen twice recently. Both times the conversation seemed to be going OK - until they asked for a picture of me. That's the last I heard from them. And a while back I had actually met a woman in person who I had also met during a free communication event, who hadn't seen my pic but who I seemed to get along well with on the phone. Once I met her, I never heard from her again.

That makes it pretty obvious that my looks is clearly one of the major things wrong with me. Which is surprising, not because I think I'm attractive, but I figured there were many other things that are much more obviously wrong with me.

Now, I can't really blame a woman for not wanting to date someone they don't find attractive - I wouldn't either. But it does seem interesting that you will often hear women complain that all guys care about is looks, that women are more interested in things like how a man can satisfy their emotional needs or if he'd make a good father. And to that, I call bullshit.

Years ago, when I was fat, I could blame my being single on being fat. Now, I'm still a bit on chunky side (5 pounds above "normal" and into "overweight" by BMI). But it's hard to believe that if losing 95 pounds didn't make me more datable, that losing another 10 would have significant impact.

So that suggests that at least part of my lack of appeal is stuff other than weight. I did start doing a little weight training about 8 months ago in the hopes that it would help me add a little muscle and look a little better. It hasn't really made much of a difference, which means I'm either not doing enough or not pushing myself hard enough.

There are other things I can't really do anything about - I'm short, and I have a condition called Shurman's Kyphosis that gives my back a curve. AFAIK, there aren't any exercises to add height, and while back surgery is possible, it was advised against as being dangerous, painful, and not particularly effective. I also have the kind of skin that is either pale or burned. I guess I could start using spray-on tan, but I can't imagine that doing anything other than making me look even more ridiculous.

I guess I could try to dress better, although I'm not sure what that would be. I could try a new haircut, but I'm kind of limited in options because I have a small bald spot that I need to keep covered. I could lose the goatee, but I kind of like it and have had it for years - it's kind of my signature. Same with the glasses - maybe different ones would help a little, but I like my thick black frames- they are kind of hipster - and I don't want to do contacts because I suck at putting things in my eyes - I've had to be held down to get eye drops.

I've included the pics I sent the last time- if you have any suggestions, feel free to let me know what I can do to not look so repulsive. FWIW, one was taken last year in Red Rocks outside of Vegas and the other was taken last month on a hike organized by an old college roommate. I suppose I could get a friend to take different pics, but if the point is to hide flaws I don't see as being real useful - once I meet someone in person, they will know what I look like in person.