License to (feel) ill...

So I'm think I'm getting over a cold or something. But I'm not sure, because I don't usually admit that I'm sick - I usually just blame when I don't feel good on allergies. It's sort of like how the first stage of grieving or dying is denial - the first stage of being sick for madanthony is usually denying that I'm sick. Usually that's the only stage.

Friday, I noticed that I had a bunch of nasal drip and that my throat was kind of sore. It continued Saturday, and I started to feel really tired, to the point that I passed out around 10pm. I kept my normal schedule though, hitting the gym Saturday and Sunday. Sunday night I could barely taste my dinner. By Monday afternoon, I was sore, achy, tired, my face felt hot, and my ears were bright red. I skipped the gym, went home and pretty much went straight to bed (after kicking the kitten out of the bed for trying to eat my leg). Slept pretty much straight until the next morning. Vowed that if I still felt as bad as I did the night before, I would take a sick day from work. I felt slightly better, so I went to work. Skipped the gym again, but didn't go to sleep.

Finally started feeling better today- good enough to go to the gym, and I can taste well again. My face is still oddly hot, though, and I'm coughing up pieces of phlegm. But I think I'm on the road to normal. I'm actually kind of glad that it seems to be cold/flu/ect and probably not allergies, because I was getting worried that I was allergic to Nibbler.

So why do I deny being sick? I think there are a few reasons. I have a reputation at work for never taking sick days (I currently have 371 hours of sick leave accumulated), and hate to break that - I figure it's one of the few things I have going for me. Plus, my employer has started cracking down on sick day abuse, and I'd hate to be made an example out of. I also don't have a doctor - my previous one retired and I haven't found a new one yet - and don't really like doctors much (since pretty much every doctor I have had has told me that the cure for everything from ear infections to poor posture was losing weight).

But it also seems to me that being sick is a sign of weakness. Weak people get sick. If I was getting enough exercise, eating right, and taking care of myself, I wouldn't get sick so much. So I don't want to admit I'm sick, because then I'd be admitting weakness.