mad anthony

Rants, politics, and thoughts on politics, technology, life,
and stuff from a generally politically conservative Baltimoron.

Sunday, April 16, 2006

Should MadAnthony give online dating a try?

Eugene Volokh has an interesting view on online dating on his website. He figures that online dating is a logical way to meet someone, because you have a much larger pool of people to choose from than in the meatspace, and thus more likelyhood that you will find someone compatible, in addition to the lower search costs of being able to go through people's profiles.

In some ways, it would make sense for me to date online. After all, I do tons of other things online - give blow-by-blow descriptions of every little thing I do on this blog, buy tons of stuff online, sell on eBay, bank online, and comparision shop for houses, cars, and mortgages. I also know several people who have successfully met significant others online. And because I have a small social circle, don't go to bars regularly (unless it's half-price burger night) and work in an industry that tends to be male-dominated (IT), it is unlikely that I will meet anyone in the real world. People also say that church is supposed to be a great place to meet people, but while I go to church pretty regularly, it hasn't really helped - most of the women my age seem to be married with kids. Even when you see a single woman who looks the right age, it's kind of hard to come up with a good opener in church. So that's not really doing it either.

But I haven't tried online dating, for a couple reasons. First of all has been time - I've been working 6 days a week, plus grad classes, so I haven't had a whole lot of time to focus on finding a better half. But it looks like my Saturday overtime will be coming to an end sometime in the next couple days/weeks/months, so that kills that excuse. I've also figured that it doesn't really make sense until I lose some more weight - I've lost some, but I'm still not exactly ideal. Of course, I also haven't really been watching what I eat (more cake, please!), so that isn't going to happen anytime soon.

But I think the real reason is my usual risk aversion, plus my lack of people skills. I'm trying to think what I would write in a profile that would make anyone want to date me, and I can't think of much. I don't really have any cool hobbies. I go to work, I go to class, I go to the gym, I come home and watch some TV and surf the internet and go to sleep. The few things I enjoy doing in what little spare time I have (reading, eBay, computers) tend to be solitary and not the kind of thing that gets the ladies all up on. And I'm not exactly known for my rugged good looks, so that's not going to help either. And that works in reverse too - even if I found a profile that I was interested in, I'm not sure what I could write that wouldn't have most girls' fingers on the delete button (or option-delete if they are on a mac).

Maybe eventually I'll develop enough self-confidence to try it. Or maybe I'll just get tired of people offering to set me up with their "friend's friend, who keeps her facial hair very well trimmed" in the hopes of shutting them up....

1 Comments:

At 10:09 AM, Blogger Muneer said...

...and comparison shop for houses, cars, and mortgages...

What really is the difference between girls and cars these days? Of all the things about dating services, I don't like that it turns people into a commodity. Now don't get me wrong, I love the internet. I am the one that says you should never have to leave your house, but the only rule is every rule has an exception.

Dating is the exception.

Now I don't want to run it for you, go try it. This is just my rant. And maybe in 10 years, and as Homer Simpson said, [if that] Internet thing is still around, I might try it.

Oh, and when you write your profile, don't sell yourself too hard. You aren't a used car. If you write the right profile, you will get one that is your style. If you try to be someone else, it skews the results.

 

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