mad anthony

Rants, politics, and thoughts on politics, technology, life,
and stuff from a generally politically conservative Baltimoron.

Monday, November 15, 2004

All signs indicate.. time to start drinking..

The college I work at is well known for it's drining - it was #17 on the "lots of hard liquor" list on the Princeton Review (if I rember correctly), and has made some alchol-related list on for the last couple years.

In an effort to reduce drinking, one of the school's organization has posted signs with supposed stats showing people aren't quite as drunk as the perception. The problem is that the signs are not terribly encouraging. Some of the slogans include "11% of students don't drink at all", "4 out of 10 students don't drink on Thursday night" and " 1 out of 3 students alternate alcholoic and non-alcoholic drinks while drinking". Not huge confidence builders.

I've proposed some new signs myself that are just as discouraging, but more fun:

"1 out 10 students is not drunk RIGHT NOW"

"10 out 10 students only drink on days that end in Y"

"3 out of 10 students have never had their stomachs pumped"

"7 out of 10 students have committed acts of vandalism of less than $100 while drunk"

"1 out of 3 students have not wrapped the brand new Navigator that Daddy bought them around a telephone pole while drunk as shit"

"10 out of 10 guys who play Dungeons and Dragons on a regular basis say that drinking has not helped them get laid"


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